This weekend was a big one. What did I do? Well, how nice of you to ask. I went to Hamburg, Germany's second largest city three hours south of where I am, otherwise known as the End of the World. Coming from a small place like Burg, it is difficult to express my first impressions in prose form, so I have prepared a dramatic dialogue.
A brief note before we begin: Hamburg is abbreviated as "HH," or "Hanse Stadt Hamburg," it's official name. I could talk about what that means, but that's a history lesson, and I don't feel like going into that. OK, on with the show.
Places people! You?! What are you doing? Put that down and get the lights ready. And remember, your motivation is: you're a small rabbit, scared, away from home. You're singled out as a sexual ambiguous character on a highschool Texas football team, but you know you're just a late bloomer. That's where your stength comes from.
And, ACTION!
ME: Well goooooooolly, Wilbur! There sure a lot of people here.
HH: Who, who's Wilbur?
ME: Where you reckon they keep all the horses at for all them people?
HH: What are you talking about? I, I can't understand....horses?
ME: And it's so bright! How they do that, make it bright when the sun's not out and all?
HH: Those are called street lamps. Listen, maybe you should just stand over here in the corner for a while and....
ME: Shit, man, did you just see that? Right there! Look! It was like, I don't know, like a train in the street. Man, that's crazy. Man.
HH: That's the Staßenbahn, the....
ME: The "Straß-a-what?"
HH: The Staßenbahn. Street cars. You know, public transportation.
ME: Public....Man, you guys think of everything! Next thing, you'll be telling me you got, like, stores and restaurants that sell all kinds of funny foreign foods like fish and chicken.
HH: Actually....
ME: NO WAY! Honey, cancel that trip to Myrtle Beach, we're staying here! Hot Damn!
So, yeah, that was me. Seriously. I was blown away. I just stood in the corner of the Hauptbahnhof for about twenty minutes watching while I got adjusted. Of the city itself, I can say this: It's gorgeous. The Hamburg Theater is just across the street with its greened copper dome and horse statues on either corner. I must have stared at that for about fifteen minutes.
The group of Teaching Assistants arrived about a hour after my train got in, at which time we all decided to go get some food and something to drink. To do so, we had to pass Das Alster, the long lake that sits in the middle of the city. Wow. It was all lit up, naturally, and the Rathaus looked like a castle instead of a town hall. It was a lot different from the little red brick building with painted wooden relief carving I pass everyday going to the store.
But there aren't any really tall buildings in Hamburg, no glass monstrosities housing corporate fat cats with bad toupees. Oh no, the Hamburger corporate fat cats with bad toupess work in beautifullly restored low buildings that look like somthing you'd see Bond frequent in the early films. Connery, people, let's be serious. I don't want to here any George Lasenby talk around here, either. And, yeah, I spelled his name wrong, but you know what, I didn't look it up because I don't care. Because he sucks. George Lasenby.
Anyway, we all ended up eating at a small French themed bar somewhere. I had fish. Yum. AND, we got stared at something hardcore when we walked it, which is always fun. After food, a couple people wanted to go Salsa dancing....I was not one of those people, but since we all didn't feel like splitting up, we went along anyway. We couldn't find it. I know what you're thinking: You counldn't find a latin themed club in a city of 1.5 million Germans? No.
Actually, we did....much later, but we went to a bar instead anyway. The point really is that I got to see a lot of people in Hamburg and talk, fluently, which is something I had missed. I will most definitely go back. But it also reaffirmed my affection for small places too, funny enough, but that's another post. Long and short: Hamburg rocks. Hardcore. I will visit it again. Later
A brief note before we begin: Hamburg is abbreviated as "HH," or "Hanse Stadt Hamburg," it's official name. I could talk about what that means, but that's a history lesson, and I don't feel like going into that. OK, on with the show.
Places people! You?! What are you doing? Put that down and get the lights ready. And remember, your motivation is: you're a small rabbit, scared, away from home. You're singled out as a sexual ambiguous character on a highschool Texas football team, but you know you're just a late bloomer. That's where your stength comes from.
And, ACTION!
ME: Well goooooooolly, Wilbur! There sure a lot of people here.
HH: Who, who's Wilbur?
ME: Where you reckon they keep all the horses at for all them people?
HH: What are you talking about? I, I can't understand....horses?
ME: And it's so bright! How they do that, make it bright when the sun's not out and all?
HH: Those are called street lamps. Listen, maybe you should just stand over here in the corner for a while and....
ME: Shit, man, did you just see that? Right there! Look! It was like, I don't know, like a train in the street. Man, that's crazy. Man.
HH: That's the Staßenbahn, the....
ME: The "Straß-a-what?"
HH: The Staßenbahn. Street cars. You know, public transportation.
ME: Public....Man, you guys think of everything! Next thing, you'll be telling me you got, like, stores and restaurants that sell all kinds of funny foreign foods like fish and chicken.
HH: Actually....
ME: NO WAY! Honey, cancel that trip to Myrtle Beach, we're staying here! Hot Damn!
So, yeah, that was me. Seriously. I was blown away. I just stood in the corner of the Hauptbahnhof for about twenty minutes watching while I got adjusted. Of the city itself, I can say this: It's gorgeous. The Hamburg Theater is just across the street with its greened copper dome and horse statues on either corner. I must have stared at that for about fifteen minutes.
The group of Teaching Assistants arrived about a hour after my train got in, at which time we all decided to go get some food and something to drink. To do so, we had to pass Das Alster, the long lake that sits in the middle of the city. Wow. It was all lit up, naturally, and the Rathaus looked like a castle instead of a town hall. It was a lot different from the little red brick building with painted wooden relief carving I pass everyday going to the store.
But there aren't any really tall buildings in Hamburg, no glass monstrosities housing corporate fat cats with bad toupees. Oh no, the Hamburger corporate fat cats with bad toupess work in beautifullly restored low buildings that look like somthing you'd see Bond frequent in the early films. Connery, people, let's be serious. I don't want to here any George Lasenby talk around here, either. And, yeah, I spelled his name wrong, but you know what, I didn't look it up because I don't care. Because he sucks. George Lasenby.
Anyway, we all ended up eating at a small French themed bar somewhere. I had fish. Yum. AND, we got stared at something hardcore when we walked it, which is always fun. After food, a couple people wanted to go Salsa dancing....I was not one of those people, but since we all didn't feel like splitting up, we went along anyway. We couldn't find it. I know what you're thinking: You counldn't find a latin themed club in a city of 1.5 million Germans? No.
Actually, we did....much later, but we went to a bar instead anyway. The point really is that I got to see a lot of people in Hamburg and talk, fluently, which is something I had missed. I will most definitely go back. But it also reaffirmed my affection for small places too, funny enough, but that's another post. Long and short: Hamburg rocks. Hardcore. I will visit it again. Later
posted by Der verwirrte Ausländer at 12:06 PM
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